Creating Havens: The Coffee Chat
A habit that I have picked up for Lent and hope to continue as a regular part of the fabric of my life: meeting up with friends. In person. At a coffee shop or yummy brunch spot. Not just texting ‘we should get together!’ or catching up at carpool while distracted or a quick chat after mass or a workout class — all great things, but I want to foster havens of connection for my heart.
I want to intentionally spend time with those around me who bless me and encourage me as a mama, wife and daughter of God, and build out the scaffolding of a haven-focused life. A life that operates knowing that things get messy and hard and icky, and that I am running a race to claim the perfect prize of heaven, but that on the way I need goodness, truth and beauty interwoven… I need a rich faith life, attentiveness to prayer and the sacraments, and good and holy people around me so that I can pour forth to my own family from a well that never runs dry. I need havens.
I have had two such ‘dates’ in the past 2 weeks and they filled my cup in ways I didn’t know I needed. One with an old friend with whom I’ve journeyed for over 20 years… we met when had 5 kids between us, and most were in diapers. Now there are 11 kids between us, all in the throes of teenage and early adulthood. There is something sacred about these kind of friendships — the shared history and memories are a balm to my soul.
The other was with a new-ish friend. I had a little package to drop off to her, and I was delighted when she suggested we meet in person instead of the usual carpool swap or front porch drop. Honestly, I assumed she was busy … a full time working mom with three young daughters. It was efficient and helpful to just drop it and run. But when she said, “Let’s meet up for coffee after morning dropoff,” my heart leapt. YES! I replied. Brilliant idea. “Wanna stop at the chapel first to pray a rosary?” ummm… double YES! What a gifted and graced morning it was. Time with Jesus and time with my sweet friend catching up.
So, this is your nudge, my friend. While you focus on good, holy and purposeful fasting, prayer, and almsgiving this Lent, consider setting up a couple coffee chats with friends. Build it into your calendar. Like a meeting. If you have littles and can’t reasonably sit in a cafe for a chat, invite a mom friend over. Don’t worry about the mess. Make a pot of coffee and lets the kids crawl around you. I think you’ll find it a life-giving habit that you will come to cherish!
Speaking of coffee chats, I’m going to start having them on Mondays at 11am EST here! Still praying through the format, but I’d love to see you there! Stay tuned! Let’s build some havens together… I’m rooting for you!
xoxo,
Alli
I did I double take because I thought this was a picture of us. (they wish)